what advertising ?

Tastelessness
But the most memorable were For Eyes optical (1994) and the Just for Feet chain of athletic shoes. In both those cases (and no other), I called the agencies before my column ran to advise them to pull the ads before they saw the light of day. A humanitarian gesture, you might say.

Both campaigns were mind-bogglingly offensive. For Eyes tried -- well-meaningly and tone-deafly -- to combine social messaging about homelessness with a two-pairs-for-the-price-of-one pitch. Just for Feet depicted a Kenyan runner being tracked by white mercenaries in a Humvee, then caught, drugged and shod in sneakers against his will. It was a Super Bowl spot -- the worst one ever.

BUDWEISER: 'Whassup!' Garfield gave it the thumbs up. The phrase became a cultural phenomenon in 2000.

For Eyes was forced to immediately pull its ads, and soon fired its agency. Just for Feet was crucified in the press, whereupon it sued its agency for malpractice and spiraled into insolvency. I didn't cause these reactions, but I sure as hell saw them coming. Now see, this is kind of a difficult point to make without coming of as an imperious, self-congratulatory windbag -- but in defense of my life's work, I'm obliged to remind my own critics that campaigns praised in the column overwhelmingly had longevity. Campaigns raked over the coals overwhelmingly were short-lived. Just sayin' is all.

The most short-lived of all was a massive global effort from Coca-Cola Co. to switch its theme from the majestic "Always" to the putatively more competitive-minded "Always and Only." I went ape, excoriating Coke for gilding the lily -- and diluting the purity -- of perhaps its most powerful slogan ever. I made my case persuasively enough that when Sergio Zyman, Coca-Cola's global marketing czar, read my column Monday morning he immediately cancelled the change.

Chalk one up for the AdReview staff.